Touring:
Sitting on the bus, looking out the windows with the landscape going by. I like the feeling of knowing nobody lives in that space, when it's just earth and animals and road. I feel free watching it blur into a color, yellow-tan, red-green, grey-white, in this color verb I am located nowhere.
How humans constantly fly through that space, inside their heated buses and trucks... but outside it is cold and human feet don't touch that part. Not too often anyway.
Untouched and open outside the tinted window, my breath heats it up, add tears and you've got a mini steam room between bus world and outside world.
As a survivalist I think about being dropped off in those spaces, how long it might take to walk to the nearest gas station, what it might be like to sleep in that barn, climb into the storm drain, if hunting and gathering skills would kick in. I'm sure I would eat meat if I was a train hopping vagabond. But I would need a lighter, and I'd have to get a pocket knife too, and boots, and I'd want to cut my hair and pass as a boy... I'd need a couple essentials if I was going to commit to a outside lifestyle for sure.
I enjoy sleeping in hotels because I think the break of white walls is healthy to cleanse my visual palate' of the super intense colors slathering my home. White, grey, light brown and other boring colors are sort of refreshing and calming. It's always a calming feeling when you are in a space like a hotel where there is little history invested. It feels lighter.
It's like the vending machine of housing. The opposite of a kitchen at home food- with a real cook and real mouthes to feed. That is always a whole kitchen of a story- every appliance and dish hold time and memories and energy. But the hotel room is just the vending machine version of food. Its simply meeting the needs in this way, you cant get too invested in the Natures Way green packaged granola bar, you just press the buttons and open the food item. It's not super delicious. You feel less hungry.
In the room you can sleep. No associations. No specific smells taking you somewhere in your mind. It is nice to have nothing there to feel.
Though, the hallways of hotels remind me of all the collage dorms I've lived in. It's that narrow passageway filled with light, it will always be exciting and risky to me. Walking though hallways in hotels is like walking through an airport. Everyones instantly sexier because there not from your city, and your not from theirs, and life is big and too wild to understand all the difference happening all the time.
Hallways have that affect, but more so, strangers behind each door, like an advent calender. Some sure to be friendly, some to be strangers forever, some to catch your eye and make your body become alert- make your eyes focus intently, like how a cat watches a bird, super still, serious; dead serious crushes walking in and out of doors. The smell of carpet. Your hand running along the clean walls. The sound of the lights on all the time, at all hours bright and wide awake hallways.
Sometimes I wanna go back to school just to feel that, perhaps this is why I am always traveling- wanting to feel the well lit hallways, hear the buzzing lights, wait like a cat for a dead serious crush to step out of one of those little doors, a little chocolate person.
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